Episode 6: 'A plate-ful of antihistamine.'

*A-choo!* Bollocks… *A-choo!* Shit.. *Wa-choo!* Fuck my life!

What’s the matter, Lee? Are you sick? 

No-

I thought Reapers were immunised against all illness?

 

They are, though apparently not hayfever. Funny bunch of fuckers my lot, eh.

(Alleged cost-cutting. Prevention vs cure and all. Still somewhat amusing, to the non-sufferers at least.)

Do you mind! Some of us actually did our jobs last night!

Sorry Ruby.

*A-choo!*Sniff* The Faerie (plural), however, are protected from every-bastard-thing; either Flipsider born or otherwise. *Sniff*

Sadly, selective deafness wasn’t part of the package, though you two seem fully equipt. Shh!

*tap*tap*tap*tap*

…now what do you think you’re doing?

Have you never seen a Reaper racking up lines of antihistamine before?

Um, Lee, I don’t think you’re supposed to-

They can’t make me any worse.

It comes in pill form for a reason, idiot.

Direct delivery my dear Ruby, direct delivera..a..ah..*A-CHOO!*

…Are you alright mate?

…Hunky-fucking-dory, Flip. Apart from the plate-ful of ground up antihistamines now scattered about my person.

*Snort*

Fuck off, Ruby.

*Snort* (followed by breathless gasps of laughter)

Right! That’s it! Flip?

Yeah.

You’ve killed someone before, right?

No-
 
First time for everything then, eh?

I’ll do it!

Of course. On your way back from ‘get to fuck’ and ‘no-chance’.

Now you’re just being dramatic.

*A-choo!* Dramatic...?

Yeah, man up and get through it. 

You’ve never sneezed til you’ve bled before, have you, Ruby?

…good point.

Did you know that it is physically impossible to sneeze with your eyes open?

Well then, seen as killing myself appears to be out of the question, I’m sure testing that theory will cause the next few days to fly by… How long is summer again?

Bout’ three months.

(Luckily for Lee, we are inhabitants of Great Britain: a country –or collection of- where the seasons, and indeed the weather, are in a state of permanent flux. Must have something to do with it being the centre of the universe…but you didn’t hear that from me.)